Friday, October 31, 2008

Trick or Treat?


I really can't believe that Halloween is here. I've known for awhile that the City of West Hollywood throws a big street party for Halloween, but what I didn't really know was how big it is for the mo crowd. (big and mo, like chocolate and peanut butter, seem to be two things that go hand and hand)

I have been looking forward to Halloween, but to be quite honest, I thought I would just attend and try and take it all in. That thought went out the window as soon as I learned a tad bit more about how much fun the night can be. I am now REALLY excited about tonight. So much so that I had a costume shipped next day, although UPS f'd it up yesterday and I now have to go pick it up at their customer service center. I will make some slight changes to the costume to make it a tad more revealing and sexy. ;) (PG of course but I will tell you this, I will look hot and for those with a naughty imagination.......)

Will Adam's Halloween be filled with fleeting tricks or scrumptious treats? (you'll find out after the election)

Have a Happy and Safe Halloween!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

The Time is Now

“Some men see things as they are and ask, ‘why?’ Others dream things that never were and ask, ‘why not?’” -Robert Kennedy

“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.”-Martin Luther King Jr.


After another half day of scouting polling places today I learned that here in LA County the No on 8 campaign has only scouted around 55 out of a total of 400 locations. (my buddy and I did 18 of them) This is insane and the campaign is inept. Despite that, I ask that anyone in California who has the time over the next few days to PLEASE get in touch with your local office and ask to help scout polling places. This NEEDS to be done in order for the campaign to send out the 5,000 volunteers throughout the state to market the NO message on Tuesday. They also need volunteers to package the kits that will be given to those election day volunteers. (scouting can be done in the day, the kits could be done at night)

This is VITAL!!!!!


During my scouting today two things of note happened:

1. We saw a car that had a license plate holder that said, "Give Life and Let Live, Donate an Organ." Below the plate on the bumper was a Yes on 8 sticker. You may make your own judgements.

2. We went to a church that we believed was a polling site. There were about 30 Yes lawn signs outside the office and no employees were present. I grabbed the signs and we took off. After about 15 minutes my conscience got the best of me and we drove back to return them. I'm sorry G-d I got carried away in the moment.

Then tonight on the way to my group's meeting I noticed that most of the signs that I placed in the public right of ways near my neighborhood were taken down. HMMMM

"Call anyone you know in Arizona, California, and Florida and let your voice be heard!"-Adam

For Information and to Support No on Arizona’s Prop 102 please visit: http://www.votenoprop102.com/Default.aspx

For Information and to Support No on California’s Prop 8 please visit: http://noonprop8.com/home

For Information and to Support No on Florida’s Prop 2 please visit: http://www.votenoflorida.org/



"IN THE END, WE WILL REMEMBER NOT THE WORDS OF OUR ENEMIES, BUT THE SILENCE OF OUR FRIENDS." -Martin Luther King Jr.

Tick Tock Tick Tock

My final Friday night, No on 8 tabling event has come and gone and I think it was the best night yet. I had the largest number of volunteers working with me, the founders of our grassroots organization came by to take pictures of our presence (this is history folks and we’ve been asked to chronicle our activities), I was accused by two of my friends, who volunteered with me on Friday, that I was discriminatory and had a propensity to initiate conversations only with the hotties that passed by (that is so untrue), rumors were spread that I was wearing our LHC No on 8 t-shirt in a size XS despite the fact that I made it very clear that I was wearing a S :), but MOST IMPORTANTLY we signed up a great number of volunteers to promote the No on 8 message at polling sites on Election day. :-) That was our sole goal on Friday.

The campaign still needs volunteers, so if you reside in California or will be visiting California on November 4th and would like to help promote our equality message at polling sites on Election day please sign up here. ELECTION DAY VOLUNTEER


After working the corner, I and two said friends went to grab a bite at Swingers. (cool late night grub place) I enjoyed our conversation and it was a nice end to a great night.

Since we finally received our order of yard signs from the No on 8 campaign, I spent a good part of Saturday making sign deliveries to people who requested signs from us at the different events that our organization has put on over the last few months. Along with those requested orders, we also planted about 30 signs in key right of way locations, within 2 weeks of an election I’m told it is legal, including Sunset Blvd., Sunset Plaza, Beverly Hills, Hancock Park, Melrose, etc... During this time we caught this old guy, who stopped his car in the middle of the street near Hancock Park, taking down a No on Prop 8 sign that was planted in a median. We pulled up next to him, honked, we both rolled down our windows and we said, “What the hell.” He said, “It was illegal to place these signs in public areas.” We said, “You are wrong,” and I then called him a bigot! He drove away and we made sure to place more signs on the same street.

I finally had the opportunity to visit dear friends of our family, who I grew up with and have known for many years, on Sunday. (mom and two daughters, one a year older than I and one a year younger) They now live in Escondido and I went to see them, along with older daughter’s husband, kids, and their family friends. It was another great day and they couldn’t have been more caring, loving, and happy for me. What I didn’t like was seeing about 8 Yes on prop 8 signs scattered throughout their neighborhood. I left them with 4 No on prop 8 signs and as I was leaving their neighborhood I thought about yanking the Yes signs. It was only a quick thought for two reasons. I’m better than that, and I want their neighbors to know exactly who supports civil discrimination and the removal of equal rights from their fellow Californians.

On Monday I scouted polling places with another friend of mine to determine how many No supporters we needed to send to each polling place to help convey our message and remind voters to Vote No on Prop 8.

Lastly I had the conversation with two other close friends of mine on Monday night whom I unfortunately did not have the opportunity to speak with when I was back in Phoenix in September. The conversation went great and I’ll once again convey how blessed I am to have such wonderful family and friends. I look forward to getting together with them when I return to Phoenix for Thanksgiving.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

A Hoot of a Hump Day

Morning

I lost my bet to Z and saw him for the first time at the gym on Monday. I approached him on Monday and told him that I owed him something for losing the bet. He smiled, took his right hand and briefly placed it on my left arm and said it was okay and not necessary for me to fulfill my obligation. It was this conversation that I had been planning for weeks, and I screwed it up. (I felt like such a loser) Hence, I did not ask him out on Monday. So yesterday, I saw Z at the gym again. We were both doing ab exercises, so we frequented some of the same equipment. Early on in my workout I waited on a piece of equipment that Z was on. So I waited about 10 feet from him, with my back towards him, and stood there patiently for him to finish. When he was done with the machine, he again grabbed my left arm and told me the machine was mine. I thanked him and moved on. When Z was done with his workout, a new experience occurred. He initiated some spoken words to me. He said something to the affect of, "goodbye and I’ll see you later." What struck me was that this was the first time that he spoke to me without I having initiated. Progress?

Afternoon

Who knew that my title for Monday’s post “Gone Hollywood” would foretell what I was to experience, in support of the No on 8 campaign, on Wednesday afternoon. All I can add at this point is ...............................................

Evening

I spent a few hours phone banking for the No on Prop 8 campaign. It was encouraging to see a huge turnout of volunteers show up to work the phones. That’s a change and I hope it’s indicative of a turning point in the campaign. Twelve days and counting.....................................

After phone banking I met two of my friends out for dinner/drinks at a local bar that does tranny bingo. (One of them has been praising this bingo night, numbers called out by a tranny, for some time) Since it was my first time there, both of them wanted nothing more than to see me win a game. Why? So my uptight arse would be forced to go on up and see the tranny. I didn’t win any games but it was an experience nonetheless.

Lastly, here’s my new favorite song.

Ercola-”Every Word” (featuring Daniella)

Monday, October 20, 2008

Gone Hollywood

On Friday I went to a stylist, whom a friend recommended, and received my first haircut since moving to WeHo in July. Like many of the other changes in my life over the last few months, this grooming call was no exception. My last two haircuts I received on my visits back to Phoenix from the same guy who I've gone to since having arrived in Phoenix many years ago.

A friend of mine from Phoenix, who I’ve known for many years, used to call me “big wave Dave.” (because of my flowing front locks) I’m sorry to say that Dave has surfed his last wave. haha (at least for now) During my first visit I told my stylist, sounds so Hollywood compared to barber, what I was most conscious about and gave him permission to do whatever he wanted. (with the caveat that if he f’d up I wouldn’t be back) At first I wasn’t sure whether I liked it, but now I’m definitely sure. I love it! He cut off most of my hair and I’m okay with that. I look HOT!!!! (or so I’ve been told :-)) The best part about it was that he wasn’t too expensive. ($50 compared to what I used to pay in Phoenix, $27) He has his own salon in the expensive retail area of WeHo without any other stylists, so how he stays in business is beyond me.

On Saturday night I went to a friend’s movie release party where I met up with two friends. We ended up talking for most of the night where I had the chance to tell one of them my story. He was fascinated by it and I’m not quite sure why. Don’t guys normally change everything about their life in the span of a few months? haha We went our separate ways around 12:30am and I stopped by Suede, a dance club. By the time I got there the place was packed and I had a hard time getting into the groove having had the feeling that the party started and went on without me. :(

On Sunday night I went to see my friend’s movie, Saving Marriage at the Regent Showcase on La Brea. Saving Marriage is the true story of the fight in Massachusetts to save marriage equality. (it’s a documentary and the trailer is below) I thought it was a powerful film and I hope that the film’s distributors work to ensure that all Americans have the opportunity to see it. After the film I went out to dinner with a new friend of mine, and his friend. I had a good time and it was refreshing to hear that my views on the gays of WeHo, and the WeHo culture were not unique to me. They too were impressed by my story and admired how much I’ve done in the short time I’ve been here.

You know what, so am I.

"Saving Marriage" trailer

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Quick Update

Over the last two weeks there has not been a whole lot going on from a personal standpoint. Most of my time has been spent doing stuff for the No on 8 campaign. Even when I did go out on Thursday with the intent on having a personal night, I got asked to help out with what some of my friends were doing. (I have a very hard time saying NO)

One thing that did happen on Thursday was that I was recognized. So my activities in "getting my face out there" seem to be paying off. haha

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Shocked and Saddened

Despite being a firm believer in the Pareto Principle (the 80/20 rule), I was still shocked and saddened to read the following yesterday from an email I received from Equality California:

"What is also unfortunate is that only 30,000 people have donated to the No on 8 campaign compared to the 60,000 who have donated to the other side.

In a state with about two million LGBT people, in a country with millions more and tens of millions of straight allies, we have to get everyone to support the fight. If every LGBT person donates we can win!"


You got to be fucking kidding me! If California's LGBT citizens could care less about Prop 8, why should anyone else? If you are LGBT, living in California, reading Stand Straight, and you still haven't given........PLEASE MAKE A DIFFERENCE TODAY!

$10, $20, $100....... GIVE SOMETHING!


If every LGBT citizen in the state of California would have given $15, (that's FIFTEEN DOLLARS) the money raised and more importantly the message sent would have been a powerful statement to our state, and the country at large, that our CIVIL RIGHTS are not negotiable. Instead, less than 1.5% of the LGBT community here in California thought it was important enough to provide monetary support and hence we find ourselves behind in the polls. (the number is even smaller than 1.5% because many straight and out of state people have supported the No campaign)

To donate today, please click here..... DONATE NOW

Please help out! I don't want to wonder why it is the few who always seem to shoulder the burden for the many. Especially when so much is at stake for all of us on November 4th.

Monday, October 13, 2008

No on 8 Gala

Last night the Gala that I first told you about in the "I'm Flattered" post took place. What a great night. The celebrity gala was held at the Skybar at the Mondrian hotel on the Sunset Strip. The event was a sell out! We had over 600 people in attendance, both straight and gay, who attended to have a good time and show their support for the “NO ON 8” campaign. I’m pleased to report that we raised a significant amount of money. :-)

I am pleased that I was able to contribute in a significant way to the success of the event, but at the same time I am selfishly a tiny bit disappointed that I wasn’t able to really enjoy the event. I led a group of about 35 volunteers whose role and responsibilities were vital to the number one reason why the event was held. The event went from 6:00PM until 10:00PM, and based on the initial schedule our job should have been done by 8:45PM. Unfortunately, the mayor of Los Angeles was late and screwed up the whole schedule. (to his credit the mayor did make up for his tardiness in a big way when he arrived) Subsequently, I had no time to really mix and mingle and I only got a chance to meet a few guys. (However, many of the young volunteers who worked for me were cute and I do have their phone numbers....hmmmm) One guy who I met on Friday, and then got a chance to speak with more in depth last night was Evan Wolfson . He is a prominent civil rights attorney who has been instrumental in the marriage equality issue for over 25 years. It was great to talk with a guy, who was called one of Time magazines most influential people in 2004, who has had such a profound and positive impact on so many people's lives throughout his career.

Here are some pictures from the event. The first is mine and the rest are from wire image.

General Gala Pictures



Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa

Eric McCormack and Loni Anderson (Will and Grace, Burt Reynolds)

Dana Delany (Desperate Housewives)

Heather Tom (Bold and the Beautiful)

One final note to add is the song that was on my sat radio when I pushed the start button after receiving my keys from the valet at 11:00PM. The song is below and I thought it fit the fight for Prop 8 and the evening beautifully. Here in California that day is today, and I hope and pray that day continues on November 5th.

Bob Sinclar-”Together”

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Uncovering K P R

On Wednesday I received an email from an old friend of mine I’ll call Mr. Tigerliver. He had read some of Stand Straight since I made it available to my family and friends and had a suggestion. He suggested that,
“You might want to edit some of that if you still want to run for Congress! Some of it is fairly graphic, and not because of orientation... more based on detail, word choice, and that fact that your mom reads it.”


I posted the "Dear Family and Friends" post on a Thursday and I emailed my family and friends during that weekend, so I did give some final consideration to Mr. Tigerliver’s subsequent suggestion before I even emailed it out. (as well as even having second thoughts about opening it up at all) After a whole lot of thought, I came to the conclusion that I wanted to be true to myself, and my initial intent, and allow the blog to speak for my life in all it’s unedited rawness.

So on Wednesday I received Mr. Tigerliver’s email and on Wednesday night the Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur began. Yom Kippur is our 25 hour period of atonement and from what I learned from the rabbi during our services, variations of the word go back to the root of the Hebrew letters k p r. (kaf/pey/resh) Our rabbi said that multiple meanings embedded with these letters include; to cover or to conceal. On Yom Kippur we are asked to afflict ourselves and to confront the wounds that we caused by our sins. Yom Kippur then offers us protection like a cover against the punishment of G-d on the day when the book of life and death is sealed for another year.

As I sat in the synagogue and listened to the rabbi’s discussion about the meanings of Yom Kippur I was drawn back to Mr. Tigerliver’s email and his suggestion of editing Stand Straight. I believe editing is a form of covering and concealing and I know I did that for far too long. So I emailed him back,
“So to your suggestion the answer is NO! When I run for congress I will be an open book. The honest truth. Voters will either like and respect that or they won’t. (with my new attitude I don’t give a shit)”


I hope that my life and blog will help all of us learn about each other and our collective futures. Coming out later in life gives me, so I believe, a different perspective on what it is like being gay in America today. (compared to many gays who I believe have been mentally and emotionally beaten down, and as such may believe they are second class, through the years by attitudes like those exposed in the article below from the Yes on 8 campaign here in California) I believe the only difference between a gay and straight person is whom G-d CREATED that individual to be SEXUALLY attracted to. As such, I’ll be damned if I am going to accept having any less rights or opportunities than all of my straight friends. (According to the U.S. GAO there are over 1,000 different rights at stake with the term Marriage)

SAN FRANCISCO, October 11 – In the same week that the No on 8 campaign launched an ad that labeled as “lies” claims that same-sex marriage would be taught in schools to young children, a first grade class took a school-sponsored trip to a gay wedding.  Eighteen first graders traveled to San Francisco City Hall Friday for the wedding of their teacher and her lesbian partner, The San Francisco Chronicle reported.  The school sponsored the trip for the students, ages 5 and 6, taking them away from their studies for the same-sex wedding.  According to the Yes on 8 campaign, the public school field trip demonstrates that the California Supreme Court's decision to legal same-sex marriage has real consequences.  



"Taking children out of school for a same-sex wedding is not customary education.  This is promoting same-sex marriage and indoctrinating young kids," said Yes on 8—ProtectMarriage.com Campaign Co-Manager Frank Schubert.  "I doubt the school has ever taken kids on a field trip to a traditional wedding," Schubert said.  



When asked by the Yes on 8 campaign, The San Francisco Chronicle reporter said she did not know if the school had ever sponsored a field trip for students to a traditional wedding.  Telling the Chronicle that the field trip was "a teachable moment," the school's principal believes it is perfectly appropriate for first graders to attend a same-sex wedding.  Officials in other school districts disagree.  



"Prop. 8 protects our children from being taught in public schools that 'same-sex marriage' is the same as traditional marriage," said Santa Ana Unified School District board member Rosemarie "Rosie" Avila.  "We should not accept a court decision that results in public schools teaching our kids that gay marriage is okay.  That is an issue for parents to discuss with their children according to their own values and beliefs.  It shouldn't be forced on us against our will," Avila added.



The lesbian teacher's wedding was officiated by San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom.  Newsom is featured in a Yes on 8 television ad, released last week, in which he arrogantly declares of same-sex marriage:  "The door's wide open now.  It's gonna happen, whether you like it or not.

"

The Yes on 8 campaign's ads explain that if the voters do not overturn the California Supreme Court's same-sex marriage ruling, teachers will be required to teach young children that there is no difference between gay marriage and traditional marriage.  “It's totally unreasonable that a first grade field trip would be to a same-sex wedding," said Chip White, Press Secretary for Yes on 8.  "This is overt indoctrination of children who are too young to understand it.”  The field trip underscores the Yes on 8 campaign’s message that unless Prop. 8 passes, children will be taught about same-sex marriage in public schools.  “Not only can it happen, it has already happened,” White said.


I’m not going to argue or debate the merits of taking a first grade class trip to a gay wedding (it IS debatable even though we are at a historic CIVIL rights moment in our nation’s history), but I believe the undercurrent of ignorance, prejudice, discrimination, and hate is very apparent in many of the quotes throughout the Yes On 8 press release.

As for my further uncovering, I have taken what Mr. Tigerliver and others have expressed to heart. (because I know they care and are looking out for me) Will it influence my future postings? I don't know. What I do know is that exposure and education allows a society to advance. I hope through my writing, I have contributed to that in some small way.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Don't Hold Back

Many months ago I mentioned that it was my goal to “show my face” in WeHo. Since my arrival I’ve spent some time attempting to do just that. However, when I made that comment I had another idea in mind. On Friday, that idea came to fruition.

What better way to show your face than to be parked on the corner of San Vicente and Santa Monica Blvd. involved in a bit of political activism on a Friday night. That street corner falls within the middle of many of the gay bars in WeHo and according to the City council member that I met, the corner has a bit of activism history. I came up with the idea, which really is no great idea but no one else was galvanizing the community like this, and led a team from our group to register people to vote, solicit volunteers to help defeat proposition 8 here in California, ask for donations to help defeat prop 8, advertise our upcoming celebrity fundraising event, and basically educating the bar and club hopping gay community about the virtues of VOTING. (and voting No on Prop. 8) You’d be surprised, or maybe some of you wouldn’t be, how indifferent so many people are to voting. It’s really sad and in my opinion SHAMEFUL! It baffles me how some people, whose own RIGHTS are at stake here in California, remain so indifferent to the importance of their vote. If they are not going to care about their OWN rights, why should we expect anyone else to?

Thankfully, there were many more people who we spoke with that were knowledgeable about the issues and extremely appreciative that we were there. There to be visible, there to send a message, and there to register people to vote. And for Adam’s sake there to show his face. :-)

I had all sorts of ideas on how I wanted to present our message when I suggested to the leadership team, of the group I have been volunteering with, the tabling idea. Unfortunately, local city and state pac rules presented a number of challenges which negatively impacted our ability to present and achieve some of what I would have liked. Nonetheless, the night turned out to be a success on all fronts.

Success on the political front and success on the personal front. It was a lot of fun going up to total strangers with a gift and a message. The gift was a sticker, and if you were out in WeHo last Friday and saw them on the bartenders and patrons, that was us. I wore our group’s t-shirt and a pair of jeans. I was a moron wearing just a t-shirt because it turned out to be a cold night, but hey I looked great. (and I paid for my stupidity by having caught another cold which has once again restricted my activities since) It was a hoot having a number of young guys, with Asian and Mexican backgrounds, coming up to me with interest. (I'm not quite sure why those particular backgrounds seem to be so interested in yours truly) One guy even offered me a rose. haha Another guy who I was flirting with, Caesar, was hot and he stayed behind a minute or two as his friends moved on. Unfortunately I let Caesar slip away. He wanted me to place the sticker on his crotch. Who asks another guy to do that? :) We went back and forth on that one and my lame excuse was that the Sheriff’s department was located across the street and my proper and legal arse didn’t want to get into any trouble in public. I ended up placing it on his left nipple and we then said our goodbyes. WeHo’s a small town so I hope to see Caesar again. :-)

It's great fun when your POAs come together, so please don't hold back!

The Chemical Brothers-"Galvanize"

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Dear Family and Friends,

Now you know I am what I am, and I have finally chosen to accept myself, love myself, and live my life as G-d created me to be!

Your love, affection, and friendship over the years has meant the world to me and words cannot express how I feel right now knowing that I am finally living a truly honest life with those most important to me knowing the real Adam.

Welcome To Stand Straight and Step Forward!

Stand Straight and Step Forward is my story. Over the last few months I have been blogging about my life and experiences. The primary reason for keeping an online journal was personal and therapeutic. I needed to change, and I was too cheap to pay for a therapist and too stubborn to ask for help. The secondary reason was my hope and desire to at some point be able to share my life again with you. From the outset, I wanted to provide you with a deeper meaning of who I am and what I’ve been going through these last few months. So it is with a great deal of respect and love that I share my journal with you today.

However, sharing Stand Straight with you has as much to do with me as it does with you. I look at it as part of my therapy in being completely open and honest with all those I truly know and care about. So please don’t feel an obligation or need to necessarily read it. It is certainly your choice. If you do choose to read it, I believe you will find posts that run the gamut from deeply personal to narratives of experiences. You will also find images of guys that I find extremely hot. This has been the most difficult thing I've had to deal with in my life and I’m extremely proud of how far I’ve come and I’m neither ashamed nor embarrassed by anything that you may view. I’m now an open book, make that blog, and I hope this demonstrates my sincerity when I told you that I wanted deeper and more meaningful relationships. I truly believe this is a start.

I also felt it was important to bridge my online world, which has been my anonymous gay world, with my real world. Both worlds have been extremely important to me in bringing me this far in my life but I will no longer live in two separate worlds. I will only live in one. It is that world, the real world, where I hope we will continue on our journeys together.

So with all of that said, here are some tips if you would like to read further.
My online name is Adam, clearly not the name you know me as. So if you ever choose to comment please keep that in mind.

I would recommend that you start from the beginning. To do that you need to go to the right side of the blog, scroll down to the archive, and start in May. The best way that I’m aware to do this is to click on the month heading and then scroll all the way down to the bottom of the page for the oldest post. Then scroll up as you read. (this way you don't have to click on each individual post)


When there is a You Tube video attached it is because, in mostly all cases, the song is very meaningful and extremely well written. (the meaning is the song, not the video itself) The words of the song convey a message which compliments and speaks to, in most cases, the message of my posts.


And one final note, Stand Straight may be a specific story about the changes I’ve made in my life based upon the uncontrollable aspect of my being gay, but when you think about it, the story is more than that. It’s really a story about all of us making positive changes in our lives with the goal of finding true happiness. (and I learned that important lesson from many of you through the years so thanks)

So here’s to leading our lives instead of life leading us. G-d willing, let our adventures continue!

Love,

Adam

Angels and Airwaves-”The Adventure”