Monday, July 20, 2009

Beginning and "Happy" Ending.....soo soo sad


Luke: Hey you!

Adam: Doesn’t the song go Hey Ya?

Luke: Haha yes there is a song called “hey ya” (emoji smiley)

Adam: Yeah, and it’s a pretty darn good song. So what did you wind up doing tonight?

Luke: Oh u know...watching family guy...lounging in bed....haha super exciting night (emoji tongue out face) how’s the moving going?

Adam: It’s going. But it’s going a bit more slowly now because I’m chattin with this guy I just met (emoji wink face). And silly me for asking that question, I knew that. LOL

Luke: Hahaha well don’t let little ol me slow u down! (emoji wink face)

Adam: You’re not slowing me down. At&t was. I’ll just stay up later. For I did just drink a liter of tejava black tea.

Luke: Hahaha so you’ll be a lil wired huh? ;-) so where’s your new place at?

Adam: Something in this place has 2 b wired cause it sure ain’t the internet. Street and Street.

Luke: Haha. Oh Street and Street is not far from me

Adam: Cool! It’s a great location. In between Runyon and the gayborhood.

Luke: Exactly! I love Runyon btw

Adam: You’re becoming even more intriguing. ;) haha. Do u run?

Luke: Haha I used to run cross country but haven’t been running in a while. But I love to hike Runyon.

Adam: Strike 1. LOL

Adam: Forgot j/k

Luke: Haha strike 1?!

Adam: For not running

Luke: Oh yes def! Haha I like you...gotta keep my ass going and in shape!

Adam: That makes 2 or us.

Luke: Haha well u look like you’re in great shape

Adam: Oh, I meant who likes me. LOL

Adam: J/k. I’ve been traveling the past four weeks and I haven’t been 2 the gym since may. I’ve put on about 5 pounds.

Luke: Oh hahaha! Oh please...5 pounds is nothing

Adam: 5 pounds is a lot when u spend July 4th in Laguna. LOL

Luke: LOL! True

Luke: Well stud I’m gonna get to sleep. Look forward to talking tomorrow (emoji wink face) hope your unpacking goes well

Adam: Likewise Smiley. Thanks, and sweet dreams!

Luke: Night you

Adam: Night ya! LOL

Luke: LOL (emoji tongue out face)


Luke: Morning ya

Adam: Good morning you!

Luke: How’d the unpacking go?

Adam: Progress was made but still a lot to go. Just got done from running 5 so going 2 jump in the shower.

Luke: Nice. Have fun in the shower ;-)

Adam: Aw, you’re sweet. If I only saw your text before. Haha

Luke: Haha well at least u got it

Adam: That I did

Luke: ;-)

Adam: So how was your day?

Luke: Hey you I was just getting ready to ask u the same thing ;-) It was great...went by quickly again. How was yours?

Adam: More unpacking, organizing, laundry, dishwashing, running to target and bbb, constructing, and lunch at daphnes. Yum! And still there’s more to do. Moving’s a bitch.

Luke: Hahahah I hear ya! But it’ll be so nice when it’s finally all done

Adam: You’re right, and I like my place :)

Adam: So what type of exciting evening do you have planned for yourself tonight?

Luke: See that’s the important cheesy as it sounds your home really should be your sanctuary and happy place (emoji wink face) I’m cooking dinner with a good friend of mine then nothin else planned

Adam: Yeah that’s cheesy. You making mac’n’cheese?

Luke: Anything exciting planned for u tonight?

Luke: Lol! Possibly...I’m not very creative or resourceful when it comes to cooking

Adam: Stir fry is always good. No, just more of the same. I plan on completing everything tonight. Fingers crossed!

Luke: I hope so! Don’t want it interfering with our dinner plans

Adam: Oh, you don’t have to worry about that. I’m looking forward to it, and anxious to see if your smile is as bright and engaging in person. ;)

Adam: The reservation is made


Luke: Awwww I just got ur messages. I like to think my smile is way better in person ;-) oooo where we going?

Adam: I thought you like adventure? Are you allergic to anything like seafood or dairy, etc...? The reservation is at 8:15 and it’s at a fairly new place that has got excellent reviews from a number of sources.

Luke: Haha u pass the test! Congrats. No allergies to worry about. Am I meeting u somewhere?

Adam: Nah. I’ll pick lil ‘ol ya up around 7:35ish

Luke: Well how gentleman-like of you...that’s a nice surprise for once...

Adam: Really!?! You have been meeting cavemen. I’ll pick u up, but if it doesn’t work out, I’ll leave you there. LOL

Adam: J/k of course

Luke: Lol! I have been indeed! You betta not leave me...i’ll kick ur ass (emoji tongue out face)

Adam: I may just like that....:P problem though is you won’t be able to catch me cause you don’t run

Luke: Hahaha! I love it

Luke: Look at u already capitalizing on my handicaps

Adam: I try. Handicap”s”? Anymore you want to tell me about? Haha

Luke: Oh u didn’t know? I’m a that going to be an issue?

Adam: Not at all. We’ll just have to meet at at the restaurant cause you won’t fit in my car. LOL like all the other cavemen.

Luke: LOL! Awww how quickly the sweetness goes right out the window. Yay I’m excited I must admit

Adam: I’m looking forward to meeting you as well. It is 07/08/09 after all.

Luke: Haha I was just getting ready to ask u what 07/08/09 was but then I got it gaga

Luke: Haha not gaga stupid phone

Adam: Yeah blame it on the phone lady gaga

Luke: Hahaha it thinks it’s smarter than I am

Adam: Cause you’re always showing it your poker face

Luke: Oh...ya good point

Adam: Got some stuff to do so gotta run. Let me know your address and have a great day! :)

Adam: Or where u want me to pick u up

Luke: Address. Have a great day!

Adam: So what will u b doing today at 12:34:56 on 7/8/9?

Luke: Hahaha I will def be working....but I guess I’ll make a wish huh?

Adam: Make it a good one

Luke: Oh I will

Adam: driving color manufacturer style

Luke: Are u here already?!

Adam: No. Leaving now.

Luke: Whew ok perfect

Adam: Here

Luke: Be right out

Luke: Thank u again for an amazing evening. I think u are a wonderful unique quality guy and I would love to get to know u better

Luke: Oh and I wanna know your full name...just bc I wanna ;-)

Adam: You’re certainly welcome and I enjoyed our time together just the same. We certainly come from different backgrounds, but that very well may be a good thing. I look forward to seeing you again in the next day or so. Would you like to plan our next adventure?

Adam: My last name is Name. Let me know if your P.I. has any issues investigating me. LOL

Luke: Lol! I would love to plan our next adventure. I will get back to you on the PI results (emoji wink face)

Adam: Yeah. Please let me know on that. I’m intrigued to know what they find out. Haha. And let me know when you’d like to plan #2 for.

Luke: Well I’m def thinking this weekend should be in order for #2

Adam: Sounds good and have a good night!


Luke: Good morning mr wholesome ;-)

Adam: Good morning back at u mr wine-o

Luke: LOL

Luke: I hope u have a great day

Adam: And u as well! :-)

Luke: I look forward to seeing u again soon

Adam: Likewise, well not seeing me cause I c me right now, but seeing u

Luke: Lol ya u see enough of u

Adam: U saying I should share?

Luke: Well I mean...selfishness is never really good...

Adam: It looks like I’ll need to work on that. Haha

Luke: ;-)

Luke: Whats ur facebook?

Adam: Search via email address

Adam: FYI, I made plans with a friend of mine for tmrw night that was confirmed today so Friday is out for #2.

Adam: Forgot 2 say the plans were made last week. I am looking forward 2 date #2.

Luke: Well we’ll just have to do something for this weekend then...I’m glad you’re looking forward to it cuz so am I ;-)

Adam: Great, more time 4 u 2 plan. Haha C u soon! :-)

Luke: Haha yep! Hope your day is going well

Adam: It is, thanks and likewise. Finally going through all of my paperwork, which was a lot and then off 2 Runyon in an hour or so.

Luke: Awww I’m jealous ur doing Runyon...I need to get up there tonight

Adam: U want me to wait?

Luke: If you would like to! I’d love to go up there with you

Adam: Sure I’ll wait. Let me know what time I should meet u at fuller and sunset

Luke: I could be up there by 7:15 ;-)

Adam: c u then

Luke: Perfect

Adam: And just so u know, this isn’t #2, so you’re not off the hook 4 planning the next adventure.

Luke: Hahaha of course not! I’ll plan something way better ;-)

Luke: We still on for 7:15

Adam: Yep. Leaving apt now 4 fuller/sunset. May b a few minutes late.

Luke: No worries...I’m walking over there right now

(With the expectation that our second “official” date was to be during the weekend, on our walk back from the hike Luke innocently said that he spoke with his mom and that he would be going home for the weekend. I was a bit perplexed and shocked to find this out because up until that point I thought, and was excited, that we were planning to go on our next “official” date. So I clearly exhibited a surprised and disappointed look on my face after he told me this sudden change to not only his, but our weekend. At the time, as we were talking about it, he inferred that it was simply a test for him to see what my reaction would be in a demonstration of my interest in him. As I admitted to Luke at the time, a very shrewd move on his part.)

Adam: I still can’t believe u did that.

Luke: Hahaha I must admit it played out a little better than I expected it to

Luke: Thank u again for waiting and hiking with me

Adam: It was a very shrewd move and suffice it to say I was both dumbfounded and then impressed. I can’t believe I was played like that. Hmmmm

Adam: And no problem. I enjoyed it

Luke: I hope I didn’t hurt u (emoji teeth grin face)

Adam: Hurt me, nah. But you might worry. LOL

Luke: Uh oh....y?

Adam: I’ll leave u uh ohing for a while. Haha

Luke: ur a cruel one Adam Last Name

Adam: Why am I cruel? U r cruel. And our whole chat somehow got deleted from my phone. :(

Luke: Haha I’m messing with ya. Awww that’s sad!

Adam: Huh, it just reappeared. :)

Luke: Oh how nice of it

Adam: Maybe it was trying to fool me as well to see what my reaction would be.

Luke: Hahaha ya maybe my phone did it and was trying to take after me

Adam: Not after you called it stupid the other day.

Luke: Oh I call it that cuz it gets off on stuff like that

Adam: Oh really?

Luke:’s pretty kinky

Adam: Does the phone take after you or do u take after your phone? Because I hear phones and their owners are like dogs and their owners. (while hiking we had a conversation about dog breeds having the personality of their owners)

Luke:’ll have to see for yourself ;-)

Adam: My mom called. I’ll have to first see if it’s ok with her.

Luke: Haha this sounds so familiar from some odd reason

Luke: Good night u

Adam: Sweet and kinky dreams ya!

Luke: Lol! (emoji tongue out face)


Adam: Morning ya! Any sweet or kinky ones last night?

Luke: Haha morning! None that I can recall’d you sleep?

Adam: Like a baby until the street work on Street started. Have a great day!

Luke: Haha hate that!!! Thanks you too (emoji wink face)

Adam: Thx!

Adam: And how was your day? Oh wait...”it went by quickly!” LOL

Luke: Haha unfortunately today didn’t go by quickly and my boss was pretty nasty to everyone...but it’s now over! Yay (emoji wink face) how was yours? Get a tv?

Adam: Sorry 2 hear that. Mine was good and my apartment is finally in order and everything in its place. No tv today, but auto insurance.

Adam: Btw when r u planning our #2 for ? Tmrw?

Luke:’s nice to have everything in order! Haha congrats on auto insurance (tongue face) as for #2...can we shoot for Sunday? I’m trying to plan something fun.

Adam: Yes it is. And congrats r premature on the insurance. I haven’t changed anything yet. Yeah, Sunday will work fine.

Luke: Haha well then I retract my “congrats.” Perfect, I’m excited to see u again.

Adam: Retraction accepted. I look forward to seeing u as well and what u have up your sleeve for date #2.

Luke: Hahaha dun dun dun

Adam: Not fair. :( I didn’t do that 2 u and we’re way too far away from Sunday.

Luke: What’s not fair? That I am trying to surprise you? That’s right...ur probably a little nervous about surprises now huh? Haha

Adam: No. It’s that you were teasing me about it. Should I b nervous about it? FYI, I’m not jumping out of an airplane.

Luke: Awww I wasn’t trying to tease you I’m sorry. I think I take my joking too far sometimes. And no lol we’re not jumping out of an airplane

Adam: Gotcha! Mr. Humility.....haha

Luke: LOL (emoji tongue out face)


Adam: Tick tock tick tock

Adam: R we still on 4 tmrw?


Adam: Did something happen? Are u alright? Can u pls call me as I’m very concerned!

So after all of that, it appears the surprise that Luke was planning for our date was to go AWOL. In the week that we had been communicating, the above was our text chat but we met and communicated for a bit on an internet site as well, I had gotten to really like him. I had also received the impression that he liked me. After finally meeting and seeing him twice.....I thought something was possible between the two of us.

When Sunday night rolled around I became very concerned for his welfare. We became facebook friends late in the week so I messaged one of his closer friends, whom he told me about, to see if she had heard from him. She had not. (FWIW, I would have become very concerned for any of my friends whom we had plans together and I had not heard from them in two days)

I didn’t hear from him on Sunday, so on Monday I called him at work. We only spoke for a minute or so as I didn’t want to bother him. I really only wanted to make sure he was alive and to better understand why he went AWOL. He told me what happened and said he would call back later in the day.

A little bit after our phone conversation I emailed Luke the following:
I hope you don't think I'm crazy or am a stalker, but I was genuinely concerned about you since I had not heard from you since Friday. I hope your ______and _______ are doing better.

In the evening Luke emailed me back:

No way! I thank you actually for calling and checking's surprising to have someone care so much like that...but very nice! I'm so sorry about this weekend. My ______ got hurt at a ______and I had to go home and my phone has been having problems (I dropped it again)

I hope that you are not too upset with me...if so I understand. But I would really like very much to plan a second date ;-)

Later on that night I emailed him back:

You're welcome, and I hope your ________ is ok and getting better.

I don't know if your phone is working but I just tried calling as I thought I would have heard from you. I'd rather talk than write so I hope I'll hear from you.

Since I never heard from him, the next day I emailed him:

I sense that these last few days for you have been a trying time. Part of me wants to be there for you to help you through it. I feel kind of odd writing that because we did just meet, but I want to be able to hold you, kiss you, and basically just make sure you're okay. You know I basically didn't get much sleep the last two nights and it's driving me crazy. Honestly, I don't know exactly why either.


I also have another sense that is beginning to wonder if this all makes sense. I mean we did just meet. You seem like a great guy, and I truly am sorry that you had a family _________ this past weekend. But with that being said, it appears you made no effort to let me know that something had come up and you had to postpone. Then yesterday, you said you would call back, and then I never heard from you. (yeah I know you sent a facebook message) I'm not angry or upset with you about these things, but I am disappointed. I believe I deserved better. So selfishly, I'm wondering if I should allow myself to get disappointed like this by a guy I just met.

I do like you Luke, and maybe it's surprising to me that I may like you more than I'm comfortable with at this point. I would like to see you soon and talk this through, but I need you to step forward, or I'm going to force myself to step away. Are you the Luke whom I met and liked and had so much fun with the first few days, or are you the Luke that has been driving me crazy and disappointed me these last few days?

Would you like to meet up tonight?

Two days passed and I had not heard from Luke. Contrary to the advice of my two closest friends in L.A. (after describing the situation and reading to them the above email that I had sent) I decided to call Luke at work again. The reason for the call was twofold. First, I wanted to soften the tone of the last email and ensure that he didn’t read it as a rigid, “take me or leave me” ultimatum. (Apparently expressing your emotions and feelings, let alone proactively communicating, is not a common concept here in WeHo.) Second, I wanted, in my mind, to be able to separate from him and continue to date and flirt with other guys. So the call was very beneficial to me. I told him that I like him and would love to see him again. I also said that he should take his time and that I am here for him if he needs someone to talk to. He told me that he had not been on facebook during the week and had not read the prior email. He also told me that he had to move apartments earlier in the week. So little by little more info is creeping out but I still find it all very odd.

Nonetheless, I’ve communicated what I’ve wanted to communicate to him and the chips will fall where they may. I really like Luke and I hope I’ll hear from him again, but the next move has to be his. Well except for his pretty little facebook pictures that I could and did use to.........well you know! :(

Less Than Jake-"The Science of Selling Yourself Short"


Bruce said...

Sounds to me like you're looking for more than Luke is willing to give. He sounds like a typical WeHo, or is that LA, flake. I'm not sure why common courtesy is such a problem in this town but it seems to be. Sorry about the disappointment, trust me I know it all too well.

dan said...

give him some time and back off a bit and let him make the next move, it's either there or not. definitely

TNC said...

Bruce, you said it about common courtesy.
Adam, it should not be surprising to have someone (you) care so much like that (for Luke). It's thoughtful and speaks to your character. Your parents raised you well.

How was your trip to Tel Aviv?