As the years have gone by, I have begun to realize that we are very much alike and that scares the crap out of me. In some ways I want to be like him but in others I want no such thing. I followed my dad into the sales profession and had a fair amount of success. I believe he was quite surprised that I took to sales as well as I did. He always thought that my older brother was better suited for sales. Why I am not sure. I’m not sure what he thought I would do in my life, but I don’t think he ever worried about me from a paying the bills, survival kind of way like he has my siblings. But from a worry about everything and everyone else kind of way, including why doesn’t my middle son with so much to offer not have a beautiful wife and all these little babies like my older brother, worry he does. It seems like all too often now my dad reminds us of his type A personality.
(Type A personalities generally exhibit characteristics such as being time-conscious, highly competitive, direct and more assertive, and less relaxed. Over the years, the type of extra stress that most “Type A” people experience takes a toll on one’s health and lifestyle. The following are some of the negative effects that are common among those exhibiting this personality: hypertension, heart disease, job stress, and social isolation. These characteristics generally have a negative effect on one’s life.)Like being a type A personality somehow makes one’s behavior acceptable. No it doesn’t! He reminds us way too often of his type A personality as an excuse for his behaviors that are just driving me insane. I don’t think he realizes that his behaviors piss people off and drive them away. Here are two examples from this weekend. First off, I am driving my parents, my younger sister, and her husband back from my sister’s master’s degree graduation ceremony in my vehicle. As we were leaving the crowded parking lot, my dad was sitting shotgun and was trying to tell me where to go. Rule #1, when I’m driving you don’t tell me where to go, so I snapped and in a loud and demonstrative voice for everyone to hear said, “shut the hell up, I’m driving and am certainly capable of getting us out of here.” I did apologize to him 20 minutes later when we stopped for gas and explained to him that for our benefit and his health he has to stop trying to control everything. The second example was the next day at a family gathering at my parent's house when he was more concerned with my brother in law leaving for the airport to catch a plane then my brother in law was. (and for the record my brother in law is a pilot) He was very vocal and outspoken as a reminder to get him out of the house. It was embarrassing. Also, you would think that after having a multiple bypass heart surgery about 5 years ago he would know that being all concerned with the minutiae of other people's business, despite how much he cares about them, is not healthy.
Like my father, I have a type A personality. And through watching him I realize that I don’t want to become the type A personality that he has become. I don’t want to become overbearing, controlling, and force others to adjust how they interact with me. This has become all too personal because there was something I wanted to discuss with him this weekend, but because of his surgery and my concern for his health and recovery I didn’t say a word.
Like father like son!
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